Tonight Pastor Pat did another great job during Authentic Leadership Session 7. Here is just a thought or two before I get to the story:
1. If you kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you would not sit for a month.
2. Self Identity – The THOUGHT I believe to be true about myself.
The biggest thing tonight was the final exercise. We have a chart of the thoughts we think about ourselves, 5 positive things on one side, 5 negative on the other. Then we discuss how those are translated into how we FEEL about ourselves.
POSITIVE | NEGATIVE
Smart |Quick tempered/angry
Funny |sometimes clueless
personable |prayer life
Helpful |Obsessive need to win
For me, the negative seemed to flow easier. Is that natural, or is that a product of conditioning? Then as I was thinking about it, a quote from the West Wing came to mind. Let me set this up for you. I loved the West Wing. And there were times that I am convinced that the Lord used something on the show to speak to me. And this was one of them tonight. Episode 5 “THE CRACKPOTS AND THESE WOMEN” began with a “Friendly basketball game between the president and his staff. Then when President Bartlett brings in a ringer Toby says “After you’re gone, and the poets write, ‘The Legend of Josiah Bartlet,’ let them write you as a tragic figure, sir. Let the poets write that he had the tools of greatness, but the voices of his better angels was shouted down by his obsessive need to win.”
That quote came to mind tonight. Tools of Greatness. Obsessive need to win. That was my fifth negative trait. I see it in my life. Home, work, driving, shopping. I have to win. I have to get the last word in an argument. I have to prove to the Loan Officer that I do know what I’m doing. I have to have a list with no deviations. There has to be that clear cut purchase at Meijer or Lowes. I have to win. Or I won’t play. I have the “tools of greatness”, but are the voices of my better angels was shouted down by my obsessive need to win? By my anger? By my tendency to withdraw if I feel like there’s no win in sight? If I were honest, my biggest fear is that the “voices of my better angels” would not be heard over my actions.
The show ends on an up note. When discussing it later Bartlett asks Toby if he meant what he said. And after agreeing Toby says “Tell you what though, sir. In a battle between a President’s demons and his better angels, for the first time in a long while, I think we might just have ourselves a fair fight.”
Lets hope I have that fair fight on my hands.